* * * SPOILER ALERT * * *
Do not continue reading this post if you have not yet watched all four series of Cobra Kai on Netflix yet. The first section of this post contains sensitive information relating to said series and all episodes affiliated, and tethered, with it. To it.
Begins.
I love Johnny Lawrence, but if he is supposed to be so "bad ass" and macho in Cobra Kai, why is he always boozing with them tiny bottles of piss water? They don't touch the sides. In many ways, we can liken Johnny Lawrence to Sartre's Mathieu Delarue in Les Chemins de la liberté; a man unable to get drunk. Yes, but for Johnny, the opposite is true because he does get drunk on those little bottles of beer, and therefore he is condemned to a life of existing as a two pot screamer.
I'm not an alpha male by any stretch, but I'm also not a half-pint Harry, so I try not to bother with the little bottles at the best of times. My favourite lagers to drink at home are the pint cans of Kronenbourg 1664 and the normal cans of Stella, and my resistance to the 1664 pint cans has now reached such a level that I can easily drink at least six of them before needing a wee.
I enjoy Cobra Kai a lot, but I wish Johnny would "stop being such a pussy", "flip the script" and ditch the Panda Pops.
Spoiler Ends.
I've listened to some fab new dance songs this week. Here's a selection of them that I'd like to review for you with those famous Best Promos scores out of ten!
I'm still not on the promo lists of any agencies yet, so I'm still spending money on music. The whole point of creating this blog was to do away with having to put my hands in my pockets. When I had my previous blog, I was sent all sort of stuff; MP3s, records and CDs. I'm starting from scratch again, which is exciting in some ways, expensive in others.
Last week I spent five pounds on the new Jacques Greene EP, Fantasy. I have always said that Jacques Greene is the best Jacques in dance music since Jacques Lu Cont, and this EP finally cements that claim.
Fantasy kicks off with Taurus, my least favourite star sign, but one of my favourite songs on this EP. It's got a broken beat thing and trancey female vocals, a bit like the vocals on Two Full Moons & A Trout by Union Jack, which is no bad thing at all.
Memory Screen + Fantasy has similar moody vocal pad things in the background over non-4/4 beats, too, but it also has a nice, uplifting synth bass melody that was all too brief. Just when I thought it was about to drop and go massive, it finished. I'd like to hear a club mix of this song.
Relay is nice. It's like a friendly younger brother to Idioteque by Radiohead. I like it.
Sky River features a singer on it called Satoimagae. I can't understand a bleeding word she's saying, to be honest, so I can't comment on the lyrical content, but musically it's really good. Again, the beats are all over the shop, definitely not a 4/4 house beat, but I'm not holding that against him. It's the kind of track Ivan Smagghe might put in the middle of a mix CD to throw the listener off before coming back in with some tried and tested electroclash.
Leave Here. If fabric were still doing their CD tins, I can imagine someone like Dave Clarke using Leave Here as his closing track on it, do you know what I mean? It's a very emotional piece of music, and it's a tune I can see being played as a gang of lads, some topless, solemnly stare into space at their after party, maybe holding hands and occasionally hugging on the sofa as their irritated neighbours are trying to have their breakfast. After Leave Here has finished, maybe one of the boys will put an old Tony De Vit mix on to pick everyone's mood up again.
Fantasy by Jacques Greene gets an unbelievable 10/10
Buy it: Fantasy EP
Follow Jacques Green on Twitter: @JacquesGreene
I went to Sonar in 2007 with some pals and fulfilled a life-long dream of seeing Beastie Boys, Miss Kittin and Richie Hawtin in a foreign country over the course of one weekend.
Modeselektor were there, too, and they finished their Sonar set with Silke by Isla Gold, and it's a moment I've always kept in the back of my mind and cherished in my heart. I'd never heard of Modeselektor before Sonar 2007, and I've not listened to much of them since - I've tried because I loved their set, but I think their music is a bit too abrasive for me. They're obviously good, and they look like they're a right laugh to go out with, but that kind of music has passed me by. I've lost my thread now, not sure what I'm trying to say.
Have a listen to Silke whilst I regroup...
Modeselektor at Sonar 2007 gets a WHOPPING 10/10 !!!
Buy Modeselektor's ambient mix, Extended Chords. It's the exact opposite of the Isla Gold track above.
Buy it: Extended Chords
Follow Modeselektor on Twitter: @MODESELEKTOR
I was looking around Bandcamp for something else to review and I saw the cover of an album which piqued my interest. Remember when you'd buy an album from your local Virgin Megastore without listening to it or knowing who the artist or band was because you liked the album cover? Do you remember that? Thankfully, I didn't part any money for ロボット P I L O T by Chrylo because it's a right load of old rubbish! I like the album cover because the man on it looks like Optimus Prime, but I listened to the preview streams and thought it was something JUSTICE might have rejected in 2006 for being too obvious and silly.
I'm not going to review this album track by track because I need to go and make a cup of tea in a minute, but I don't like it. It's crap. What I won't do, either, is tag Chrylo in when I Tweet this out to the Internet because I don't want to hurt their feelings. I'm sure some people like it. Yes, yes they do...phew! Look:
I'm glad about that. I'll give Chrylo 10/10 for effort. It's a better album than I could come up with!
Buy it, please, I feel bad now: ロボット P I L O T
I might do a bit next week about NFTs and cryptocurrency, and how bad it all is. I might also do a bit about Joe Rogan and Spotify, and how bad it all is. I'll probably do a bit about #PartyGate and all, and how bad the Torys are, and how bad it all is. I might make fun of Nadine Dorries and Jacob Rees-Mogg's funny accent, too. LOL
Email me here: bestpromos4eva@gmail.com
Tweet me here: @BestPromos4Eva
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