Dimple thy cheeks with laughter and dare not exclaim against thee, by pain of death and snarky online sub-Tweets, I beseech you. For Best Promos is the word and the way. Tread in the wake of me and breathe in perennial Paradise until the batteries run out.
Hmm, it wouldn't be perennial then, would it?
Hang on. Just checked my Collins English Gem Dictionary and I was right the first time, the "batteries" line does work after the use of the word, "perennial". Phew.
Now. Let's listen to some dance music! COME ON!
Space Dimension Controller, when he's not controlling dimensions in space, is ALWAYS making dance music. I think it's his job, poor soul. And this week, he's putting a r-r-r-r-r-really big eight track EP (EP?!) into the shops on the Hypercolour label.
Is it good?
Hell yes it's good!
It's called Na Púcaí and it's definitely good.
I can't find any videos or streams of any of this release anywhere yet, so I've taken the initiative and videoed a bit of my favourite track from my emails:
It's alright, isn't it? That one's called Continuate and I think it's about flying through space or something. I love it. It goes on for six minutes, and I promise you won't get bored by the fourth (minute).
The rest of the album, I mean, EP, sounds a bit similar to Continuate, except some tracks are faster than others and others are a bit slower. Weirdly, some of the tracks don't have any kick drums on, which is ok if you're into Brian Eno and that lot, but not ok if you only like dance music with kick drums in.
Me and all my mates prefer dance music with kick drums in it, but I won't let that get in the way of a MASSIVE 10/10 for Na Púcaí. It's a splendid release and Space Dimension Controller should be feeling extremely proud of himself. Well done, mate * double thumbs up emoji *
Na Púcaí is out on Friday 6 October (I can't believe it's October already!) on Hypercolour Records.
Pre-order it NOW: hypercolour.co.uk/album/na-p-ca
Follow Space Dimension Controller on Twitter and on Instagram
Follow Hypercolour on Twitter and on Instagram
Now, we don't just listen to moronic dance music at Best Promos, we are also a gang of culture vultures who are constantly on the lookout for enriching things to do to enrich our lives. Mmm, enrichment.
Do we love the theatre?
Hell yes we love the theatre!
On Saturday night I treated the team here to a trip to Stratford-upon-Avon to see a play by the disgraced Canadian sprinter, Ben Johnson. It was called Every Man out of His Humour and it was being performed at a place called The Bear Pit by a company called Sweet Sorrow. I did have a look for Ben Johnson in the foyer, but I didn't see him...maybe he was in the changing room swallowing a load of performance enhancing drug pills. I don't know.
I also don't know what his play was about. I sat through about two hours of it, but I didn't have a clue what they were all going on about, and for a really clever bloke like me, that was a, that was a, that was a...I don't know what it was, but none of this is to say I didn't enjoy what I wasn't understanding. The acting was brilliant, and if everyone in that cast aren't Academy Award winners in Hollywood by 2030, I'll eat Jamiroquai's hat!
So, Every Man out of His Humour by the druggy runner, Ben Johnson, gets an enhanced 10/10 by the whole team here at Best Promos
I think they've finished the run now, so you can't go and see it and then tell me that you understood it to try and make me feel thick.
Follow Sweet Sorrow Theatre Company on Twitter and on Instagram
Listening to dance music at home is great, right? Right. Listening to dance music in a nightclub is even better, right? Hell yes!
Ok.
How about this: listening to dance music in a nightclub for only five pounds plus a one pound fee to Resident Advisor to cover the cost of providing their ticketing service? Sounds perfect, right? Right. So what's the catch, I can hear you saying. Let me tell you something, readers...there is no catch. Six pounds will get you a ticket to a nightclub in London to hear dance music being played all night long (from 8pm to 1am).
Man Power (real name, Powerful Mann) and Megan Leo (real name, Megan Leo) will be playing at my favourite central London nightspot, The Social, on Saturday 21 October for a party called SWIRL. Unfortunately, I'm in Essex that weekend, so can't make it. I need to organise my life better. There's no point in keeping on writing about clubbing if you're not going to a club more than once every five years.
If you've never heard Megan Leo play before, have a toot on this recent mix by her and her mate:
It's good, isn't it? It's a bit like the set I played at The Woodman in Ruislip last weekend. I'm trying to foster the Ruislip scene, but it's difficult when all anyone wants to listen to around here is Whitney Houston and Sean Paul.
Anyway, SWIRL at The Social. It'll be a lorra, lorra fun because of the venue and the DJs, and I hope the SWIRL people let me know asap when the next party is so I can sort my calendar out and come down.
Come on.
Buy tickets for only six pounds: SWIRL at The Social
Follow SWIRL on Instagram
Follow Megan Leo on Instagram
Follow Man Power on Twitter and on Instagram
Follow The Social on Twitter and on Instagram
iT'S TIME NOW FOR A NEW FEA...WHOOPS, SORRY. GOT MY CAPS LOCK ON. That's better.
It's time now for a new feature on Best Promos. It's called Interesting Pictures, and what it is is that every week I'm going to scavage around through the bins of the Internet for days on end, looking for the most interesting picture I can find. And it's got to be dance music related. I can't stress that enough. Has to be dance.
This week's Interesting Picture is of top dance writer, Joe Bloggs, I mean, Muggs. Joe Muggs. It's Joe Muggs and Steve "Interesting 147" Davis, the top snooker player and DJ.
That new feature stunk, didn't it, readers? Let's have a listen to a bit more dance music and then I'll turn the blog off.
Moody looking baked beans super fans, Ivy Lab, released a couple of new songs the other week and one of them was with Manni Dee. I've liked Manni Dee for years now, so I'm really pleased to see him doing well for himself - even though he's from Wolverhampton (boing boing). That Adidas thing was ace. Ivy Lab have been around for years now, and all, and whenever I put their music on full blast, the boring old lady next door always sends her 7-stone husband around to ask me to turn it down. After laughing in his face, and blowing ganja smoke in his face, I turn his wheelchair around and give him a push to the end of the driveway, still laughing.
They do make me laugh, old people. Have a listen to this:
I had this one on at about 3am the other night, full blast, and I think that's the optimum time to listen to it. It's proper evil sounding, and at that time of night the neighbours are usually too scared to come knocking. Especially if I've got about twenty or thirty Ruislip Hells Angels pepped up on Charlie Chalk and steroids fighting with each other on the driveway, and that's as good a reason as any to whack a big fat 10/10 on top of it. Super stuff, guys.
Ghost x Dead Signal by Ivy Lab / Manni Dee is OUT NOW on Twenty Twenty London.
BUY IT NOW: Ghost x Dead Signal
Follow Ivy Lab on Twitter and on Instagram
Follow Manni Dee on Instagram
Follow Twenty Twenty London on Twitter and on Instagram
I'm knackered now. I'll be back next week with Radio Ruislip. I've been having a few problems with the guest host, Eminem. He keeps swearing, so I might have to ask Ringo Starr if he can step in again.
Bye bye.
Email me: BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /bestpromos4eva/
