Pashernate Love (Joy Orbison Remix)

"Wednesday night raving crew. Who's got work in the morning? No yawning. Olly olly olly...oi oi oi..."

Really makes you think, doesn't it?

I write today's post with those moving words swishing around my head like wet cement in a plastic bag on a roundabout, and you should study them too, like coursework, because words like them don't not get put down together in that way very often like that, do they?

I was at The Social for Just For You on Wednesday night, the party organised by Joy Orbison (real name, Roy Orbison), and it was grrrrrrrrilliant! I'm still trying to calculate a score in my head for it, but I think it's going to end up being high. Probably a nine or a ten. I arrived in a good mood and with a happy heart because I'd just been to see Frank Skinner at the Phoenix Arts Club, so that was a nice start to the evening, wasn't it, readers? It's not often you'll read a dance music blog and have someone say they went to see Frank Skinner and then Joy Orbison, and that's why Best Promos is the best, or at least: the most different blog in dance.

I had a pint of lager at the bar upstairs before going downstairs and drinking another pint in the middle section of the club. That's four pints of lager including the two pints I drank at Frank Skinner. After that pint, I went for a wee and another pint of lager, which I pushed my way to near the DJ booth to drink. It was then that I noticed I was dancing very earnestly to UK 2-step garage for the very first time. Lady Passion was on and she had an MC with her, barking about how great she is, which was as good as I've made it sound. I'd never been to a garage night before, so I never really got it or listened to much at home, but the energy was bang on. I absolutely loved it.

That bit has made me sound like one of them square coppers who dance at the Notting Hill Carnival and let the kids wear his helmet. LOL. I'm not a square, though, or a pig. I'm definitely not a square.

"MC Riddler B is not only the best MC I've ever heard live, he's the only MC I've ever heard live, and I just saw him MCing live over the brilliant UK 2-step garage that Lady Passion was playing live on vinyl live in that DJ booth, live, there, as it happened in the club, at night, and I loved it! I've only ever really gone to house, techno and minimal techno parties, but this has opened my mind! I love it, man! Yeah! Can I get a rewind selectaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!", I screamed in the ear of the nice, patient man who runs The Social after he'd kindly invited me to the backstage VIP area to discuss terms on a future Best Promos night at The Social. We broadly agreed there and then that Best Promos at The Social is a good idea, and I shared with him my DJing credentials and CV to support my application:

• I have a Pioneer DDJ-SB3 controller and a laptop with Serato DJ Pro on it, so I know my way around the wheels of steel
• I have a 1TB disc ramma jamma full of good music, all organised in a very professional way
• I am on a few promo lists now because of Best Promos, so some of my music is new
• I have successfully DJ'd at numerous weddings and 40th birthday parties
• I've got a Disco Halal t-shirt
• I like The Social and have ploughed at least £100 into it on lager money in the last couple of months
• I follow Pete Fowler on Twitter
• See below for the folder structure of my 1TB drive. I have highlighted the genres that get played at The Social all of the time anyway, so I could easily fit in on the bar or something:

Watch out, John Digweed!

So, in summary: Just For You at The Social was really good. Lady Passion and MC Riddler B were properly brilliant. The bloke who was on after Lady Passion was good and Joy Orbison was good, and all. It was comfortably the best Wednesday night I've ever had, and Best Promos will be back to cover the next one.

Just For You at The Social - a whopping 10/10 !!!

Follow The Social on Twitter and on Instagram

Follow Joy Orbison on Instagram

Follow Lady Passion on Instagram

Follow MC Riddler B on Instagram

"Alexa! Play Lady Passion!"

LOL. Alexa is always getting it wrong, isn't she?!

Steve Bug is a name you can depend on. I doubt that it's his real name, but it's a fab DJ name. It's punchy, and it always makes me think of Bugged Out!, which is no bad thing. He's got a new single out next week on Poker Flat called The Haze which his PR people were kind enough to email me. I've had a listen and it's r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-really good.

It's got an acid bassline with claps on the 2 and 4 and Ali Love crooning about how he can't see straight because of the summer haze. Have a sit down, Ali, get a nice cup of tea and a Mars bar and re-focus. Maybe undo a few buttons on your shirt and let the air in. In secondary school, Robert Mason accidentally hit me on the head with an iron bar in DT. I couldn't see straight all afternoon and my vision was exactly the same as the predator's alien vision in Predator until about 4pm. You'll see straight again, though, Ali. It'll be alright, mate.

Poker Flat Recordings · Steve Bug - The Haze feat. Ali Love

I'm joking, of course.

The Haze is the kind of song that you could listen to at The Social during a Best Promos night because it's really, really good. It's so good that the PR guff uses the legendary "low slung" term to describe it and I'm going to store it in my 'DANCE MUSIC' folder as soon as I've published this post! In fact, it's so good that I'm going to score it a mind-boggling 10/10 !!!

The Haze by Steve Bug is out on Friday 29 July 2022 on Poker Flat

Buy it here: The Haze feat. Ali Love

Follow Steve Bug on Twitter and on Instagram

Follow Ali Love on Instagram

Follow Poker Flat on Twitter and on Instagram

I'm a bit knackered now. I've covered quite a bit on today's post, but I do normally write three reviews, so I'll just say thanks to Matthew Clayton on Twitter for sending me the Bandcamp link to Old Rottenhat's Hi-Fi Vol 1 by Old Rottenhat. I've been listening to it whilst writing this, and it's done an ace job at calming my nerves and relaxing me into the groove of creative writing. Even now, I'm feeling at one with the blog as the hypnotic, soulful fumes of Higher State whisp (is that a word?) and whirl around my head and face and ears. I'd never heard of Old Rottenhat before, but this is a really lovely, funky album, and it's only five pounds.

If I'm being really honest with you (I am), any of these songs would sound good in the bar at The Social..

Hmm, I'm nodding my head in a very serious manner, pointing my fingers at the speakers and tapping my feet in an enigmatic fashion. Only music with a score of 10/10 makes me do that.

Old Rottenhat's Hi​-​Fi Vol 1 by Old Rottenhat is OUT NOW

Buy it here: oldrottenhat.bandcamp.

Follow Old Rottenhat on Twitter

To be even more honest, I'm still a bit hungover after Wednesday night. It's all worth it, though, isn't it, readers?

It is, isn't it?

Isn't it?

I'll be back next week with a brand new item on Best Promos called Really Big Questions where I'll be sharing the details of an EXCLUSIVE interview with Steve Bug. He's talking with me because he likes Best Promos, not because he just wants to plug The Haze.

Email me on : BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /BestPromos4Eva/

Rest In Peace, Avery off of EastEnders.

A Rose Between Two Slags

If you've not watched the new Better Call Saul episode yet, don't bother reading the second section of today's post, because I'll be talking about what happened in it. They call that a "spoiler" in Hollywood.

Look at me with my trendy words! LOL

Until I get to that bit, have a look at this bit:

Everyone knows that EastEnders is the best UK series on the telly. Whilst still in it's first season, EastEnders carries a maturity and a familiarity that usually comes about three seasons in on one of your wishy-washy American box-sets. My favourite characters, so far, are Sharon Mitchell, Kat Mitchell and Phil Mitchell.

Ahh, Phil Mitchell. A rose between two slags. Recently, he's been at a love crossroads. Turn left for a slag called Sharon, turn right for a slag called Kat. He's spoiled for choice, bless him. I'm not fully caught up on this week's episodes, but the last thing I saw was him almost telling Sharon he loves her before shouting at her for wanting to shag Grant and then sprinting across the Square to tell Kat he actually loves her instead and that he wants to be with her forever and to be a faaaaaaamily. That scene ended with Phil and Kat having a sensual snog in her front room. I bet by the end of the week, he'll be having a 2-in-a-bed romp with Sharon!

Oink oink.

Speaking of things in the UK, Manni Dee has got a new 3-in-a-bed EP coming out on his erotically named label, Silk + Steel. It's called The World Goes On Without You - which sounds like the kind of title Morrissey would name a ballad - and it's r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-really good. I'm not on Manni Dee's promo list, so I've only listened to the one I bought on Bandcamp last night, The Remedy. I'll be able to listen to the other two tracks on Friday, Pillow Princess and See Me Now, unless I buy the wristband. Then I'll have Clasp and Pillow Princess (Instrumental). Yeah, I should do that. Although, they're limited to 50. They might have sold out by the time I finish this post.

Sorry, I didn't explain that very well. The World Goes On Without You is out on Friday 15 July, but you can pre-order the digital EP NOW and get to download The Remedy TODAY or you can buy a USB wrist band and get the EP plus two bonus songs.

Yes, that makes more sense.

The Remedy is ace. It starts off as a fast techno-type thing with a really loud kick drum and a man with a high-pitched voice saying "bah" every two beats. This goes on for a bit before another man with a deeper voice starts rapping about where to store his microphone. It's brilliant. What stands this out from loads of other West Midlands techno, though, is the bit in the middle where the beats slow down to a scary hip-hop pattern and Di-Vincent starts rapping about knives and forks! How many other techno songs have you heard do that? None. This is why Manni Dee is not only a great bloke, he's also one of the most innovative and exciting producers in the UK today.

#HOG4EVA

Like I said earlier, I've not heard the other two tracks yet, but if the PR stuff on them is anything to go by, we're in for a treat:

Pillow Princess is a "nasty mutation (not sure if I like the sound of that, actually) of hyperpop and techno", and See Me Now is a "straight up banger with a terrifying synth-driven melody and a big f*ck-you bassline"!

If I had to compare Manni Dee to a character in EastEnders, I'd have to say Jay Brown. They're both nice young men with a lot going for them.

The World Goes On Without You. I do love that title. Should I give it a 10/10? Hmm. Yes! This get's 10/10. Well done, Jay, I mean, Manni Dee.

The World Goes On Without You is out on Friday 15 July on Silk + Steel

Pre-order it here: Manni Dee - The World Goes On Without You
Follow Manni Dee on Instagram: @ManniDeeUK

Right, Better Call Saul. Everyone says that this is the best programme ever, and that it's better than Breaking Bad, The Sopranos, This Is Us, Ozark, The Inbetweeners, Russell Brand's Ponderland, The Wire and EastEnders put together, but is it? Is it really?

It might be. I do love it, and I do look forward to watching it every Tuesday lunchtime, and I do always treat myself to a Yorkie Duo and a grab bag of Skips to enjoy whilst I watch it. Maybe it is better than This Is Us after all. It's not as good as EastEnders, but it is definitely better than Ozark. Howard, I mean, however, this week's episode had me conflicted. Why oh why oh why was Lalo being such a big show off when he had Gus where he wanted him?! All he had to do was have Gus open the big laundry door, have a very quick peek inside, film it from that balcony and then kidnap Gus and drive him down to Mexico so that he and Don Eladio could torture him to death.

That's what I would have done.

It was a great episode, but as soon as Lalo started bragging loads and was taking too much time cracking jokes into the camcorder, I knew he was going to peg it. It did my head in a bit.

Speaking of people who have been to Mexico, Daniel "Mr. Drone Logic" Avery's Ultra Truth is STILL available to pre-order on Bandcamp. I did a brilliant write-up of his Chaos Energy song on here a while ago, and that review and score out of ten is still valid for up to 12 months. I don't need to review or score it again until 21 June 2023, but what I will say is this...I don't know...

...I did start off this bit thinking I'd write something funny about me (seriously) suggesting to Confidence Man that Ivan Smagghe would be a good remixer option for TILT and Daniel Avery commenting in a very waggish manner that Carlos Santana and a bloke out of Matchbox Twenty should remix them, but I can't think of anything better to add to that particular exchange. Sorry. Sub-consciously, I think I've only included this bit in a brazen, desperate attempt to get noticed by some of my favourite DJs and artists.

If I had to compare Daniel Avery to a character in Ozark, I'd go with Wyatt Langmore because they've both got long, scruffy hair.

Err, Ultra Truth is out on 4 November 2022 on Phantasy and it'll probably still be a 10/10 on here.

BREAKING NEWS - Higher by Daniel Avery is out now, so there you go, a proper reason to include the stuff about him today. It's really good. 10/10

Buy Higher here: Higher | Daniel Avery

Pre-order Chaos Energy here: Chaos Energy
Follow Daniel Avery on Twitter: @danielmarkavery
Follow Daniel Avery on Instagram: /danielmarkavery/
Follow Phantasy on Twitter: @phantasysound
Follow Phantasy on Instagram: /phantasysound/

And finally, a brand new promo has just flown into my inbox from HYPE Filter. It's a track by Roska, and it's called Call Mi. Call Mi features なかむらみなみ (that's easy for you to say!), Sweetie Irie, Serocee & Flowdan. I've heard of Roska, but not the others, so I was dead excited to have a listen to it.

Have a listen for yourself...it's got nothing to do with anything off the telly...

...it's good isn't it? I'm going to put this on a mix for the car and I bet the kids are going to like it. I don't really know what I'm talking about when it comes to this kind of music, but it sounds like a jollier version of Boasty by Wiley, which is no bad thing at all.

What else? Call Mi is versatile...to the max. It will not only sound wicked-bad on a massive sound system in Barbados, it'll sound just as radical being blasted out of a massive, croaking sub-woofer in the back of your dad's Ford Fiesta as you cruise it around that estate I was talking about in the previous post. I'll tell you THAT...jabroni!

And another thing, I really like the cover artwork. It makes me feel like I'm coming out of a really bad k-hole. I'm sat in the corner of a really annoying stranger's living room at their after-party on Christmas morning, the festive lights are slowly coming back into focus and I'm feeling happy again. Where are my shoes? There they are, just where I left them. Merry Christmas, everyone. Merry Christmas! I will be back home to see my wife and kids for lunch and the Queen's speech!

Let me raise a toast. 10/10 for Roska on today's new release, Call Mi. To Roska!

"Roska!"

Call Mi by Roska feat. なかむらみなみ, Sweetie Irie, Serocee & Flowdan is OUT NOW on Roska Kicks & Snares.

Buy it here: Roska - Call Mi 
Follow Roska on Twitter: @RoskaOfficial
Follow Roska on Instagram: /roskaofficial/

Almost forgot. Sorry Roska. If I had to compare Roska to a character in EastEnders, it would have to be Simon Wicks because the bloke who plays him, Nick Berry, is also a successful musician.

Notices.

• If any DJs or producers want to be interviewed on here, let me know and I'll email you some questions.

• If anyone wants to put me on some different promo lists, that would be ace. Thanks. I listen to and review EVERYTHING I get.

• I am also open to reviewing events.

• I am the best writer in dance.

Enough about me! LOL. I'll be back next week with some more Best Promos. Thank you for reading, everyone. Goodnight! Bye!

Email me on : BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /BestPromos4Eva/

Me Soul On Fire

"Ole ole, ole ole! Ole ole, ole ole, feeling hot hot hot!" Yeah! Woo, BABY! Is it hot in the Best Promos offices today, baby, or is it hot?! Woo! Yeah. It. Is. Hot. I'm sweating like a CONTENT REMOVED BY BEST PROMOS LAWYERS. No offence, guys!

It's so hot that I think I'm going to take off all my clothes and run around the BP car park screaming at any passing peeps with a water gun to shoot me in the hair, face, body, arms, bits and legs!

No, that's the kind of thing Pottsy would do. I'm not that zany! LOL

What I am going to do, though, is stick a fan on and listen to some ice-cold dance music promos with a Magnum in my mouth. Mmm. Promos. When I'm done with them, I'm going to review them on this blog; Best Promos. Mmm. Best Promos.

Bear with me, caller.

Robotek Reagan, at the controls, yesterday

I've got another RED HOT Robotek Reagan EP in my inbox. He doesn't stop, does he? Robotek Reagan has either got no life or he's got a life, but his life is to just continually make and release spooky dance music in his Hollywood Hills mansion. On listening, anyone would think he lived in Barnsley or Wolverhampton. It's really depressing, druggy (in the heroin and ketamine sense, not the steroids or ecstasy E tablets sense) stuff he produces. If I lived in Los Angeles, I wouldn't be making the kind of moody music Robotek Reagan sicks up every week, it'd be wall-to-wall David Morales type tunes. Everyone wearing massive sunglasses and dancing with their tops off around my Beverly Hills pool, laughing and smiling and pointing their fingers in the air as I bring in another piano loop. Sangria everywhere you look, a Magnum in every mouth. Everyone patting me on the back and telling me how great I am. I'd love all that.

Maybe Robotek is not a happy person, deep down, but I really think that he should try and make a jolly, sunshine EP for us all to enjoy next, because he's obviously a very talented young man and he could have a great future ahead of him if he keeps his head down, stays polite and respectful to his elders and puts something out that will get him a b2b with The Martinez Brothers this summer. Or David Morales.

(dark side of the) TRANSHUMAN AGENDA is quite a weird and evil sounding EP, definitely not something you should be listening to in the summer, but it's very well produced, so I'm giving it a 10/10 for that. Another classic by Robotek!

I don't think there are any preview clips out yet for this, but I will share them on Best Promos when I get them. I promise. So, in lieu of anything new to share by Robotek Reagan today, have a look and a listen to this:

(dark side of the) TRANSHUMAN AGENDA by Robotek Reagan (USA) is out on my sister's birthday: Friday 29 July 2022

Keep refreshing his Bandcamp page until you're able to buy it: Robotek Reagan (bandcamp)
Follow Robotek Reagan on Twitter: @robotek_reagan
Follow Robotek Reagan on Instagram: /robotek_reagan/

I hope he cheers up after this review and gives the fans what they want.

Up next is Just Remember by Sharda. This is more like it. This is the kind of SWELTERING track that makes you want to take your top off and cruise around the estate in a Ford Fiesta with a Magnum in your mouth and an arm hanging out the window. It's a red Fiesta and it's all geared up with top-of-the-range murky ICE in the boot, massive speakers and a sub-woofer, all controlled via the Kenwood car stereo. Pepper-pot alloys gleaming in the sun and a spoiler on the back that makes all the girls want to jump in and kiss your cheeks (all four of them) as you aggressively blare Just Remember out to all of your OAP neighbours and intimidated parents who are trying to put their kids to bed.

Oh yes, Just Remember by Sharda is a UK 2-step garage type thing that will work just as well on Kiss FM, Capital and Radio 1 as it will in a nightclub like...I don't know. I've never been to a club that plays this kind of music, but I like it a lot. I should broaden my horizons a bit, really, and go somewhere other than Secretsundaze and The Social. Not that I go clubbing much anymore. Maybe when the kids are older, I'll get back in the game.

Right then, I’m here announcing that my new single *Just Remember* is out on @coilrecords this Wednesday.

Pre-save https://t.co/IfAytGq10D pic.twitter.com/vKak7PYuEg

— Sharda (@dj_sharda) July 11, 2022

Just Remember starts off with loads of nice high-pitch vocal samples and fast guitar licks before one of them bouncy UK 2-step garage basslines kicks in, like the one in True by Jaimeson, and it goes on for about four minutes. If any other website can describe it better than that, I'll eat my big Jamiroquai hat.

It's a r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-really good song, and it's made me so happy that I'm going to dig deep into my score bag and pull out a............10/10 !!!!!

Just Remember by Sharda is out on Wednesday 13 July 2022 on Coil Records.

Pre-order it here: djsharda/just-remember
Follow Sharda on Twitter: @dj_sharda
Follow Sharda on Instagram: /dj_sharda/
Follow Coil on Twitter: @coilrecords
Follow Coil on Instagram: /coil.records/

And finally, I travelled all the way to Taipei last week to download the latest SCORCHING release on JIN Records. I was so impressed by JIN 06 by Yetsuby in February (big respect and a massive up to Ransom Note for opening my ears to that) that I started following JIN on Bandcamp, that way I'll NEVER miss a release by them. When I saw that JIN 07 was coming out at the end of June, I hopped on the first flight to Taiwan with a Magnum in my mouth. I sat at the front and was pestering the pilot all the way there to put her foot down because I was desperate to get my hands on their new MP3! When we landed, I got off the plane and sprinted all the way to Taipei, and straight into the best record shop in the whole, wide world; White Wabbit Records. I approached the nearest shop assistant and, for some reason, shouted at him in a very broad Black Country accent.

"Woo! Mate! 'Ow bin ya? Download me the new EP by Mr. Ho on Jin...NOWWWWWWW. It's called JIN 07. Get it me now, mate."

He said something in Mandarin.

"You what, mate? I cor understand what yowm sayin'. Spake up or spake English."

He fixed me in the eyes with a friendly stare and said something again.

"I said I doe know what yam sayin', mate. Doe yow spake English? Can you get me the new JIN EP? JIN. It's a dance EP. You must have heard of it, mate."

He shook his head and looked confused, so I spoke much louder and much slower.

"MATE. DOWN. LOAD. JIN. 07. BY. MR. HO. FOR. ME. NOW. IT. LL. BE. IN. YOW. DANCE. SECTION. DOWN. LOAD. DOWN. LOAD. JIN. JIN. RECORDS. MATE."

禁 JIN · Mr. Ho - Drumtuhl

The old man smiled, nodded his head, took the Magnum out of his mouth and spoke gently in my ear, "ahh, mate. Thank you for talking louder and slower. You mean JIN 07? For this striking 7th EP on JIN, we are lucky to have Mr. Ho back for another massive delivery. This time complete with fully versatile house music.

"YES. MATE. THAT. IS. THE. ONE. I. WANT. DOWN. LOAD. IT. FOR. ME. NOW. MATE."

The old man chuckled and nodded again, "ahh. This EP provides a whole spectrum of tools for house heads. Groovy, melodic, banging, or loopy, Mr. Ho has got them all covered, mate."

The old man scurried to the back of the shop and came back with a hand-scribed scroll with one of them candle-wax seals on it. It read:

https://jinrecords.bandcamp.com/album/jin-07

I thanked him for the link by bowing and doing the praying hand gesture and came straight back to Eastcote in Ruislip to listen to my new MP3.

It's so good that I'm going to give it a 10/10 !

JIN 07 by Mr. Ho is OUT NOW on JIN Records.

Buy it here: JIN 07 | Mr. Ho
Follow JIN on Instagram: /jinrecordstaipei/
Follow Mr. Ho on Instagram: /mrhodj/

Phew! What a scorcher! And I'm not talking about the weather in London today, I'm talking about this scorching post on this blog! LOL

I'll be back next week, probably, with some more trendy wendy music for you to listen to. Until then, here's a picture of an old man.

Email me on : BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /BestPromos4Eva/

"Eat Magnum ice-creams. They're really tasty!"

magnumicecream.com

The Ultimate Warrior

Cor! Thank God Boris Johnson has been sacked, eh, readers?! He was rubbish, wasn't he? Eh?! The next bloke or blokette who takes over will definitely get the country out of our Credit Crunch chaos, won't they?! Good luck to whoever that is...they'll need it! LOL.

Bit of politics there. Or was it political satire? I don't know.

What I do know is that I started writing this post on the 4th July, that's why the picture (further down) of the two Red Bubble people has them wearing American gear.

The other day marked the twenty something anniversary of the death of the best DJ to have ever set foot inside a nightclub DJ booth. No, I'm not talking about Josh Posthuman or Man Power. Or DJ Gerd Janson or Jacques Lu Cont. I'm not even talking about Ricardo Villalobos or Jon of the Pleased Wimmin. I'm talking about my favourite DJ in the whole wide world; DJ Tony de Vit.

4th July #vibes

In memory of TdV, if you have a few minutes spare today, listen to this 11-hour Tony de Vit set from the inside of Trade. It's really good and it gives you a flavour of what it would have been like to listen to Tony live for eleven hours in a club full of muscle men.

It's good, isn't it? I had to turn it off whilst I was writing this, though. It was doing my head in.

I've been pushing for a hard house revival for the last 10-15 years, but be careful what you wish for, readers. I had Radio 1 on last Friday night and Pete Tong was playing a contemporary track that had all the 90s hard house ingredients: 130-135 bpm, silly vocals, a build up that had high pads, rolling snares and that thing where the kick drum and cymbal comes in once every four bars or something, then every two bars, then every bar and then every one, etc., building to a crescendo of kick drums and cymbals before getting back into the meat of the track. Sounds brilliant the way I've described it, doesn't it? Yes, but it wasn't. It was crap and I wish that I'd never wished for a 90s hard house revival because the other year they came for 90s trance and that was crap and all.

I don't know what the track was (I tried to Shazam it, but it wasn't recognised), so I can't slag off whoever it was who made it, unfortunately. To make things right, here's one of the best hard house songs of the last 200 years:

I bet you any money that Bicep start playing that now.

Speaking of Bicep, I know a man who's got TWO biceps. He's called Man Power (real name, Manfred Power) and he's a friend of a bloke called Juan Maclean (real name, The Juan MacLean). In 2020, Man and Juan met up at the very height of lockdown to record an LP called The Juan Power LP. Whilst keeping a distance of two metres at all times, they made six brilliant tracks of "full tilt moving grooves! Technology driven house with progress features!" under the moniker, Juan Power. Do you get it?

Juan Power are BACK with a MASSIVE EP in 2022 that is ALSO brilliant. This one is called Ramon's Return and features a sassy-sounding guest vocalist called Mizbee. I don't know why it's called Ramon's Return. Juan Power - get in touch, lets touch base, grab an ice-cold Cola X and get to the bottom of why you've called it that.

I don't know when it's being released either, to be honest. I'll keep you updated on here, though, don't worry.

The first song on Ramon's Return is called In Your Palm. It's quite tropical sounding, with a nice bassline and some nice percussion things in the background that I think is Man Power playing the drums with a wooden spoon and some pots and pans. It's a really nice touch and it made me feel really nice when I listened to it. I don't know what Mizbee is singing about on it, but she sounds nice. It's the kind of track Andrew Weatherall would have had a selection nightmare over on his fabric mix. He'd be up all night thinking, "ooh, do I use Don't Hide It (Alexkid's Vocal) or In Your Palm to lighten this mix up? I don't really know! Ooh..."

The second track is called Communion, and all I can say is this: these two have never stepped foot inside a church. I take the Holy Communion every Sunday morning and they don't play music like this when you're queuing up to receive. You're more likely to hear Amazing Grace or Room at the Table than eight minutes of chuggy, hypnotic loop-core that will definitely make you question who you are, where you are, what you are and why you are if you're listening to it about three pills in at the back of a warehouse.

Ascending to Florus is the third track. It's got Juan MacLean talking in a funny German accent over the top of a repetitive bassline and some horror sound effects. I don't know what Juan MacLean is talking about, to be honest, but he does do a good German accent! LOL. There are no drum beats in this track, unfortunately.

The last track is the first track, but they've CUT Mizbee's vocals.

So, is Ramon's Return any good? Let's put it to the team here at Best Promos...

...guys, is Ramon's Return any good?

"Yes."

Excellent. On the strength of that feedback, I'm going to award this EP a stonking 10/10 !

When some public clips or something are out, I'll stick them on here for the twenty or so of you who read Best Promos to listen to.

I don't know when it's out, but keep refreshing their Bandcamp page until it is: JUAN POWER

Follow Man Power on Twitter: @Man_Power_Music

Follow Man Power on Instagram: /manpowermusic/

BREAKING NEWS - Ramon's Return is out on Friday 5 August 2022

Follow The Juan MacLean on Instagram: /thejuanmaclean/

Speaking of tracks that have some vocals in them, here's the new EP by the scary-sounding Zombies in Miami. It's called The City of Love and it's grrrrrrrrrilliant! The title track is one that would have given DJ Dixon a selection headache over when compiling Body Language Vol. 4, "oh my God", he'd be saying, "do I use The City of Love by Zombies in Miami or that Tracey Thorn one?!. Bloody hell, come on Dixon, make up your bloody mind, the deadline is tomorrow!"

It's a cool and trendy song that will make you look cool and trendy if you play it out, which is no bad thing at all. As well as hypothetically going on that 00s Dixon CD, I reckon you'd also hear this at an ALFOS night or a club where Wolf + Lamb are playing. Excellent stuff.

djmag · Premiere: Zombies In Miami ‘The City Of Love’

There's a remix by Barnt which is good and all, and their PR people say it better than anyone when they describe the third track on the EP, Aurora, thus; "Aurora is showing a way into a journey that invites us to let go of our concerns." Beautifully put and I wholeheartedly agree.

If I was in Miami and a zombie had a gun to my head, I'd definitely give this release a 10/10

The City of Love by Zombies in Miami is OUT NOW on Motordiscs.

BUY IT HERE: The City Of Love

Follow Zombies in Miami on Twitter: @zombiesinmiami

Follow them on Instagram: /zombiesinmiami/

Follow Motordiscs on Instagram: /motordiscs/

And finally, a big up and a massive respect to the max for DJ Alex Cuddles. Long time reader, Alex, kindly offered Best Promos here a spare AAA VIP lanyard for tonight's event at the best venue in central London, The Social. Tonight, you've got a big nerd-off between Bill Brewster and Frank Broughton for an hour before they jump on the decks and play records until 1am. If I didn't have four episodes of EastEnders to catch up on and kids to look after in the morning, I would have definitely gone.

YOU SHOULD TOO.

If you do go, keep shouting "DJ Cuddles" at the top of your voice whilst Bill and Frank are talking. When he runs over to shush you, buy him a drink from me.

The new version of Last Night a DJ Saved My Life is OUT NOW.

The launch party of it is at The Social TONIGHT.

Buy the book: Last Night A DJ Saved My Life

Go to the party: The Social party link

Follow DJ Alex Cuddles on Twitter: @DJCuddles

Follow DJ Alex Cuddles on Instagram: /alexcuddles75/

Listen to DJ Alex Cuddles live on Brixton Radio every Tuesday between 12 and 2pm: Brixton Radio

Follow The Social on Twitter: @thesocial

Follow Bill Brewster on Twitter: @djhistory

Blimey. A lot of plugging there, I'm knackered now. Bye!

Email me on : BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /BestPromos4Eva/

Party of Special Things to Write About

Not only is he breathtakingly good at playing the guitar, Jack White is also a big copy cat. First, he copies Berghain by BANNING mobile phones from his gigs, then he copies Katy Perry by dying his hair blue, and now he's copying something else by doing something!!!! LOL

I went to watch Jack White at the Hammersmith Apollo last night and it was brilliant. Best Promos mega-fans will remember that I went to see Damon Albarn earlier this year and it was good, but a bit dull because he just sat at his piano and noodled for an hour and a half, and didn't do any Blur stuff. I say "good", but "interesting" is probably the word I should have used, or "really, really boring". Everyone was pretending to like it, but deep down, I don't think they were. That's the problem with trendy music, sometimes you have to say the right things just to keep socially afloat, even if you don't really believe it.

Every other song Jack White played last night was a White Stripes song, so he made it impossible for me to come on here today and say it was boring. Thanks, Jack. I can't remember the full set list because I was drunk, but I did manage to push myself to the back of the mosh pit area. I wanted to crowd surf, but nobody else was doing it, and I was too shy to ask the woman next to me if she'd lift me up.

He ended with Seven Nation Army, but I wish he'd played Black Math instead. But, because of the hair and the phones and the White Stripes songs, I grant Jack White at the Hammersmith Apollo 10/10

Follow Third Man Records on Twitter: @thirdmanrecords

Go and see him on tour: thirdmanstore/on-tour

That was a very poor review. I'm not a professional, though, so it's alright.

Speaking of Americans, I am pleased to announce that the team here at Best Promos are pleased to announce that we are all pleased to announce that we have now MADE IT in America, and by that, I mean that Best Promos has been "shouted out" on a top rating Milwaukee Twitch feed that literally TENS of Americans around Milwaukee watch each week. Phoole & the Gang is a breathtaking online radio show hosted by a woman called Phoole (real name Dusty-Rose-Darleen Miller-Williams) with madder hair than Jack White and a basement I can only describe as frightening. Each week, Phoole barks enthusiastically about the music she's playing and "shouts out" only the best people and blogs in the world and Milwaukee, so I was as proud as punch when she "shouted out" Best Promos last week. Thanks, Phoole!

Watching Phoole & the Gang is like watching The Big Breakfast, but with everything except the Zig and Zag bits spliced out, and that can only be an excellent thing, so it gets a very special 10/10 from everyone here at Best Promos.

Become a Phooligan and connect/watch/whatever the stuff that Phoole does, because she's a sound person and it's nice to be nice.

Follow Phoole on Twitter: @Phoole
Follow Phoole on Twitch: twitch.tv/phoole

Follow Phoole on Instagram: /phooleofficial/

All Phoole stuff here: ffm.bio/phoole

Bloody hell, I forgot that this is a dance music review website. Sorry, readers!

DANCE MUSIC

I was having a chat with Enno Lombaert at Dispersion PR last night whilst waiting for a taxi at Rayners Lane. I phoned him up to see if he'd watched that night's EastEnders.

Hi mate, did you watch EastEnders tonight? Don't tell me what happened, but was it good?

"Parker’s hi-NRG, euro disco, nu-beat and energetic house leanings are distilled into Love Me Love Me, a vocodered 80s stomp, glistening with love and sweat, and zero tears in sight."

What? How's Sam Mitchell? Don't tell me what happened, but is she going to be alright?

"Following the Radio 1 hammered Kiss on Saved earlier this year and 2021's Somebody Scream/You’re One of a Kind on Trick, Parker is no stranger to ‘big tunes’."

What do you mean? I'm talking about Sam Mitchell being shot in the club the other night. I've been at the Jack White gig tonight, so I don't know if she's alright. Again, I don't want the details because I'll catch up tomorrow. I just want to know if Sam is going to pull through. Only, she's one of my favourite characters at the moment.

"His output for Rekids, E-Missions and Work Them Records marks him out as an artist who is as adept at crafting deep, underground house and techno as he at creating peak time, crossover club hits."

Forget it.

I hung up and listened to the white label MP3 of Love Me Love Me by Spencer Parker full blast on my phone outside Chicken Cottage. It's breathtaking Italo at it's breathtaking best, and it'll get played in clubs from Milwaukee to Timbuktu. Mark my words. The best bit is when Spencer Parker starts singing, "love me, love me, love me, love me..." in a funny female robot voice.

The teenagers in Chicken Cottage were all dancing and pointing at me with massive smiles on their faces. The bloke serving the chicken was whooping and hollering at me whilst doing that finger click thing that Patrick always does on EastEnders. I shouted, "yeah man!" and began to march on the spot with my head down when the taxi driver arrived. When he heard Love Me Love Me blaring out of my phone, he got out the car and asked me for a rewind. I said no, sorry, I'm tired, so he drove me home. It's a great tune, though, so it gets a WHOPPING 10/10 from me! Even the radio edit is good.

Love Me Love Me by Spencer Parker is out on Work Them Records on Friday 15 July. I'll embed some videos or SoundCloud stuff when it gets out on the web...

Keep refreshing this Bandcamp page until it appears as a pre-order: Work Them Records
Follow Spencer Parker on Twitter: @spencer_parker and Instagram: /spencerparkermusic/

Follow Work Them Records on Instagram: /workthemrecords/

Three posts in three days. This is like when I used to write the daily Hotflush blog for Scuba! I should stick to one per week because by day three, the energy and the quality of my writing nosedives. Today's post proves it. LOL

Anyway...

Just a gentle reminder to buy the new Ambient Babestation Meltdown and JBS EP: Who Goes There EP

Just a gentle reminder to buy the new Robotek Reagan EP: transhuman love affair

Just a gentle reminder to keep reading Best Promos and spreading it all over your social media channels. I'm not on Facebook. I get Twitter, I barely understand what I'm doing on Instagram and Tik Tok can eff off.

Just a gentle reminder that I'll be back next week with some more deep dives into the world of dance music. Definitely not writing any more posts this week. Definitely.

Email me on : BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /BestPromos4Eva/

Making Love and Breaking Hearts

Hello.

Robotek Reagan is BACK with another 4-track EP and it's called transhuman love affair and it's on Bandcamp and I've just spent $7.77 of my left-over American money from 2008 on it and it's r-r-r-r-r-really good and and and and and and and...

...and I tried to read the PR description of it, but it looks too overwhelming. Look:

Scanning it, however, I can see reference to OnlyFans, subs, Simps, tattoos, doms, dominance, deep house and sex, so if it doesn't do the trick when you're listening to it in the bedroom department with your other half, or on your own in the toilets at work, then you are well within your rights to ask Robotek Reagan for your money back. Cashback guaranteed.

This is the sensible, serious kind of sexy music that I think, deep down, Tiga wants to be releasing. 

It's all quite introspective and moody, which is nice if you're in a bad mood and want to calm down a bit. I'm not sure if any of this EP will be played at Circo Loco, though. I reckon it'll get some air in the chill-out room at a club somewhere (I can't think of any clubs at the moment, sorry), especially the title track, transhuman love affair (æytherspace soundbath mix) because it's an ambient song with no beats. It's just a few minutes of more plinky plonky keys, droning bass and the women from that Two Full Moons & A Trout song popping up every now and again.

After many years of writing dance music reviews in one form or other, every dance music release worth it's Charlie starts off with a beat-less ambient song. I don't know why. Robotek - get in touch and tell us what's so good about ambient?

simp4u sees Robotek Reagan singing his little heart out about not wanting to wake up from a dream. We've all been there, mate. Last night I dreamt that I'd got promoted to the role of Head of Cloud Services. I had the team running like clockwork and the Head of Service for ICT was recommending me to the Director for Corporate Services to take over from him when he finally retires. I was on cloud nine and feeling fulfilled professionally. I did not want to wake up and continue my job of starting and restarting services on on-prem and cloud-based servers and looking through MECM logs for task sequence failure lines. It's a great song.

some1: like_U feat. Karina Junker sees Karina Junker (I think) singing her little heart out about someone like me whilst Robotek Reagan plays some sexy, dominant, deep and tattooed house music in the background. It's really good, and I reckon this one could get played at Circo Loco, actually. I can imagine a Mediterranean woman in a bikini and a clown wig turning one of those sirens on near the DJ booth as Tania Volcano blasts this one out.

Same goes for the fourth track, pressy (extended 'i'm peaking' mix). It's loopy and nice. Ricardo Villalobos could play this at an after-party in a club in Turkey and nobody would bat an eyelid. This song sounds like it was made in space by a space-based dance music producer. I can't understand what the singer is going on about, but it's all breathy and seductive, which, again, is probably what Tiga should be doing. Nobody wants to hear a DJ camping it up about Bugatti cars and having loads of dosh in the middle of the cost of living crisis.

So, in all, transhuman love affair by Robotek Reagan is yet another bullet in the chain gun of an already impressive arsenal of dance floor weaponry to get pulled out of the war chest of Robotek Reagan and many other DJs who have already bought into the devastating musical genius of Robotek Reagan. I think. This has to be a very solid 10/10

transhuman love affair by Robotek Reagan is OUT NOW.

Buy it here: transhuman love affair
Follow Robotek Reagan on Twitter: @robotek_reagan
Follow Robotek Reagan on Instagram: /robotek_reagan/

As promised in the previous post, here's that hilarious lookalike I noticed whilst watching Supergrass on the telly last week.

Ready? Ok.

Don't you find it weird, readers, that the only Bee Gee who isn't dead is the one who has also been stayin' alive during the time period that Supergrass have been alive and when they wrote and recorded all of their albums? And tell me this, have you EVER seen thin-skinned Barry Gibb and lamb-chopped Gaz Coombes in the same room together OR on the same stage???

I'm not being funny, but if they're not the same person, I'm Clive Anderson and YOU'RE the tosser, pal. LOL

Which one is the tosser, pal?

That wasn't as funny as I thought it could be. Maybe I should have put more Bee Gee's puns in.

If you've ever been to Italy, you'll know all about Asian Fake. They're one of Italy's biggest indie la...hang on, let me start again.

If you're really interested in indie music and read about it all the time and are involved in the indie scene in some capacity, and you're aware of the indie scene in Italy, you'll know all about Asian Fake. Same principles can apply to knowing who Lele Sacchi is and NTS. Well, Lele and Asian Fake have worked together as a team and have pulled in the same direction to create a new record label, Stolen Goods, and I've been lucky enough to receive a first edition MP3 zip folder of their first compilation. It's called Volume 0 and it's ramma jamma full of BANGERS the likes of Robotek Reagan could make if he took his nose out of his navel and cheered up a bit.

Ransom Note legend, Bawrut, has got a good song on there. Plastician, I mean, Plastikman, I mean, Plastica has got a mucky house tribute to the film, Jumanji, on it - which is fab - and Lele Sacchi, in my opinion, has the best one on it. It's an uplifting piano house thing with a man shouting "HEYYYY" on it every now and again. It really cheered me up after watching Kendrick Lamar the other night and I bet you any money it will get played at Watching Trees in September - probably by Ally McTropical. In the league of modern uplifting piano house tracks, I'd put it up there with Happy House by The Juan Maclean

I caught up with Lele whilst he was coming out of the toilet in the San Siro, Italy. There wasn't even a game on...

Lele. Hi. Best Promos here, do you mind if we ask you a couple of questions?

"Mama Mia. Hi. No, go ahead."

Your new compilation is great, we all love it over in England, but can you explain why you called your label with Asian Fake, Stolen Goods?

“Why Stolen Goods? Since the avant-garde era all contemporary arts are based on stealth and theft, especially in the DJ and clubbing scene: when your world is not represented, you write your own rules, you draw from it and make your own - that means dubbed illegal mixtapes, pirate radio, illegal parties, re-edits and ‘DJ only’ bootlegs....”

Thanks Lele. Au revoir!

Stolen Good Volume 0 is an ace collection of trendy, underground dance floor songs that everyone from Dalston to Hackney will appreciate. If you live in Walsall, Wolverhampton, Moseley or Kings Heath and are still wearing a fisherman hat, thick-rimmed specs and a long beard then I'm sorry, this release is not for you. See below for the score out of ten, though...

Various Artists (incl. Bawrut, Ruff Stuff, DJ Rocca, Elisa Bee, Lele Sacchi & more)
Stolen Goods - Volume 0 - 10/10

Stolen Good Volume 0 is out on Friday 8 July, but I can't find any pre-order links or preview clips. I'll retrofit them to this post as and when they're available or someone sends them to me.

Buy Lele Sacchi's stuff on Bandcamp: Lele Sacchi
Follow Stolen Goods on Instagram: /stolengoodsrecords/
Buy stuff from Asian Fake: asianfake.com
Follow Lele Sacchi on Twitter: @djlelesacchi and Instagram: /lelesacchi/
Follow Asian Fake on Instagram: /asian_fake/

And finally, a plucky young upstart from Craggy Island, Tr One (real name, Trevor One), has got a NEW album coming out next week called From The Studio Of and it's on a NEW record label called Intrinsic Rhythm, which is intrinsically a great name for a label.

From The Studio Of kicks off with an intro track called Intro, and guess what...it's an ambient track. SEE!

The rest of the album, thankfully, is more upbeat and clubby. My favourite track on it is Minimal Nelson, but I'm not sure if that's just because I like the name.

Have a listen to the snippets and decide for yourself whether you want to buy it or not. Don't let me sway you either way. Make your own mind up.

Tr_One · Tr One - From The Studio Of LP Snippets

It's good, isn't it? You should definitely buy it. Go on. You only live once. Ahh go on. Go on, now. Ahh will you go on and buy it? Go on. Ahh go on, go on, go on, go on, go on. Now will you just go on? Go on. Go on, go on, go on. Go on.

Go on. Another reason to buy From The Studio Of is this: if you run it backwards on the limited edition b-side of the white label vinyl release, you get to hear Tr One's minimal hard house edit of My Lovey Horse. LOL.

From The Studio Of by Tr One is brilliant, and it gets a whopping great kick up the arse 10/10

Release dates: 9 July 2022 (Bandcamp) / August 2022 (Vinyl)

Pre-order it here: From The Studio Of
Follow Tr One on Twitter: @Eddie_TrOne
Follow Tr One on Instagram: /eddie_reynolds_tr_one/

I think I'm done now. From all of us here at Best Promos, we wish you a very happy Christmas and a fabulous New Year. Goodbye, everyone! Goodbye!!!

Email me on : BestPromos4Eva@gmail.com
Tweet me: @BestPromos4Eva
Instagram me: /BestPromos4Eva/

Ps. I'll be signing copies of Best Promos at the Jack White gig in Hammersmith tonight.