Best Promos: One Does Not Simply Write Best Promos

After the blazing success of last week's Best Promos cover shot of Matt Hancock in the GMB Morning Britain television studios talking about how great Best Promos is, he's been invited to all sorts of showbiz (show-business) events and Public Relations (PR) parties. On Sunday night, he was invited to the screening of Oxide Ghosts: The Brass Eye Tapes by Michael Cumming at The Gate Cinema in posh Notting Hill - not far away from where Hugh Grant was famously, ahem, kissed down below by Liz Hurley in a posh car park and then arrested for, ahem...hmm, this is a family blog. I'll stop that particular, ahem, anecdote. Anyway, you get the picture! LOL

I caught up with Matt about Oxide Ghosts when he was walking back to the tube. He'd had a few sherberts by himself in The Uxbridge Arms and could hardly string a sentence together.

"Matt, what did you think of Oxide Ghosts, then, mate?"

"Oh, it was, you know, really, r-r-r-r-r-r-r-really good, I mean, great. You feel me?"

"Brilliant. Did you learn anything new about Brass Eye?"

"Yes. I learned that there were a lot of out-takes and bloopers that never made it to air in the original series. And I l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-learned that Michael Cumming didn't direct the 2001 Special. It was so good, you get me?"

"Excellent. And did you ask a question at the end, Matt?"

"I wanted to, but I was too sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shy."

"Oh, Matt, you silly thing. What did you want to ask, you daft apeth?"

"I r-r-r-r-r-r-really wanted to ask what percentage of the audience in the Kilroy bit on the Sex episode thought they were there for the filming of a serious talk show."

"I suppose you'll never know now, will you Matt? You silly thing. Did you meet any celebs?"

"Oh yes. I had my picture taken with David Walliams and The League of Gentlemen. I wanted to ask David Walliams if he's still in touch with Big Boy Barry, but I was too sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shy."

"Oh! You are silly, Matt. What are you?! Anyway, I'll let you get on the tube, it's cold when the sun goes in, isn't it?"

"Yes, it's c-c-c-c-c-c-c-freezing now. Before I go down the steps, I'd just like to ask you to review Oxide Ghosts: The Brass Eye Tapes on the blog and award it a whopping 10/10 from me, MP Matt Hancock MP. Thanks Best Promos, and I'll see you later. Bye!"

"Thanks Matt."

Oxide Ghosts: The Brass Eye Tapes is still on tour. Buy tickets here.

Follow massive Matty Hancock on Twitter: @MattHancock

Follow Steve Pemberton on Twitter: @SP1NightOnly

Follow David Walliams on Twitter: @DavidWalliams

Follow ReeceShearsmith on Twitter: @ReeceShearsmith

I didn't mean to start this week's post like that, but I liked the picture that Matt Hancock texted me last night so much, I just haaaaaaaad to start with it.

Anyway...memes are great. Check out this example meme I created using Google Images, Snipping Tool and Microsoft Paint (my three artistic tools of choice) and tell me that memes aren't great.

The title of this post is a little bit of a red herring, though, boys and girls, because today's post is not just a platform to shpwcase, I mean, showcase, the very best - and funniest - dance music memes; I'm also throwing in some hilarious lookalikes!

Here's one now, look:

Who do you reckon did this mix for Ran$om Note, Fleabag or Azo?

Ransom Note · Azo: The 'Shine A Light On' Mix

I'll give you a clue: the person who did that mix was NOT the one who worked on Killing Eve, but it MIGHT have been the one who acted in this video here, now:

I don't think Fleabag would do an interview with a website like Ran$om Note, but you never know! It's a really good website (Wil, I owe you an Apple Sourz one day - reach out), so she might! LOL

The point of that bit was to let you, the readers, know that I think Azo looks a bit like Fleabag. She does, though, doesn't she?! LOL. They can't stop us laughing, and where do my hilarious lookalikes get you? Right in the funny bones!

Have a mooch around Azo's fun website: azomusic.com

Follow Azo on Twitter: @AzoMusic

Want another lookalike? A hilarious lookalike??? Yes?????

You asked for it...strap your sides in...!!!

DJ Windows 98 out of Arcade Fire doesn't half look a lot like Martin out of Deutschland 83, Deutschland 86 and Deutschland 89, do you know what I mean? LOL

Pre-order the new Arcade Fire CD from HMV: WE CD by Arcade Fire at HMV

Follow Arcade Fire on Twitter: @ArcadeFire

Follow Jonas Nay on Twitter: @Nay_Jonas

Hey. One of my many male mates (he/him) in one of my toxic masculinity WhatsApp banter groups has just sent me a horrible meme. I don't think it's funny, so I'm calling him out on it.

Corky - you really shouldn't have shared this one, mate.

Sorry about that, guys.

Follow Nina Kraviz on Twitter: @NinaKraviz

Let's have a look at a wholesome (but still hilarious) funny meme that doesn't turn our stomachs.

Hmm, a bit cheeky, but it's not nasty like the Nina Kraviz one. You can laugh at this one in front of your mother. I used to love the Tidy Boys and the Tidy Girls. The good old days. Things were more simple, weren't they? I'm sure they're nice lads with fab personalities, but I can't imagine the balding, speccy Tidy Boys would be surrounded by top-class DJ crumpet like Anne Savage, Lisa Pin-Up, Rachel Auburn and Lisa Lashes if they weren't international hard house DJs...

Follow The Tidy Boys on Twitter: @TheTidyBoys

...look at this hilarious lookalike, guys! These two, long-haired layabout, homeless-chic DJs are really cool, but which one is which??? LOL

Before I forget, today's post is sponsored by DISCOLIDAYS, the new vinyl label by my new best friend, The Reflex.

Look at the Bandcamp page: DISCOLIDAYS

DISCOLIDAYS will be knocking out remixes that use the original multitrack (I don't know what that means) from established and underground artists (I don't know which artists), plus exclusive material (I don't know what material).

My favourite thing about DISCOLIDAYS is the logo.

It's a lorra, lorra fun. Very colourful, visually breathtaking and it really conveys that sense of breathtakingly colourful fun that The Reflex brings to every single one of his remixes.

My favourite thing about DISCOLIDAYS is the music.

Excellent stuff, and both tracks on DISCOLIDAYS 001 are at an eye-watering 118 bpm, meaning that if you stop dancing, a bouncer will wander over to where you've sat down and boot you repeatedly in the eyes until you clamber to your feet and begin to jig again.

Whilst writing all of that fluff, my mind couldn't help telling my brain that The Reflex looks a bit like the singer out of Frankie Goes to Hollywood! He also looks like my next door neighbour, but I'm not going to put a picture of him on here.

God works in mysterious ways, but my head works in even weirder ways!!! LOL

The first release on DISCOLIDAYS is brilliant, and all of us here at Best Promos can give it no less than the respectable 10/10 it so richly deserves.

It's out on Friday 1 April 2022. No, seriously. I'm not trying to trick you. 1 April.

Pre-order it here: DISCOLIDAYS 001

Follow The Reflex on Twitter: @TheReflexMusic

This next hilarious lookalike is a good one.

If you're short-sighted, remove your glasses or contact lenses. If you've got 20/20 vision, drink 8-10 pints of strong Polish lager and spend half an hour spinning as fast as you can on a roundabout in your nearest playground.

Done? Great. Now, if you sit on a rocking chair with your screen set to the lowest brightness setting and squint hard enough at this image I've mocked up, Irish blog-house dance music enthusiasts, Bicep, look exactly like the singing hard man out of Erasure with the army hard man and Purple Heart winner, Sergeant Major Ant Middleton, out of the SAS fourth battalion, third marines...